School Tantrums

Why does going to school have to be such a painful experience... its been 2 months since my son started school and he still hasnt settled in... he had a 5 day holiday from school and today when i went to drop him there was a big tantrum again... screaming crying... i just dont understand it... i thought he was very independent.. hes been used to staying at my moms, or with his other grandparents or my aunt etc etc and he was always very independent... ever since the school routine has started he has become more clingy and more insecure... why are the other kids more independent than my son... i am trying to understand what i am doing wrong... i dont think its only because i work because there are so many other working moms and stay at home moms whose kids are very happy at school... its very disturbing... i hate to see him so upset when i leave him at school.... like im this mean mom who is deserting him somewhere... Its only in our country where kids are made to start school so early at 2 yrs... if i didnt put him in school now then he would not be prepared for any school admissions early next year... i feel this academic pressure on already and i hate it... hes so small to be feeling any pressure... its just the way our school systems are designed... why cant children just learn slowly and gradually and enjoy their childhood... but the sad thing is i dont think i can take him out of it because if later he doesnt get admission in any good school i would feel responsible for not gearing my son up for the challenging competitive world ahead of him... its like this stupid system is controlling us...
Or maybe im just being overly hyper about it because my child is not ready for it yet...
I know hes smart... he knows everything they teach at school and he picks up new concepts very fast.... he was speaking and saying his opposites and ABCs when he was barely past 1 year - so i am not worried that he will not succeed but i worry for him emotionally... what am i supposed to do to build up his confidence and his emotional strength and sense of security... i spend a lot of time with him when i am back from work... maybe i spoil him too much - i dont know what it is... But more than academic excellence i want him to be a confident, emotionally strong, self-aware, honest, secure human being with a strong civic sense and ethic... how can i teach him that...